stairwell accompaniment:Grace Potter and the Nocturnals

i dreamed i made myself a halo out of cardboard
i wrote you a letter on an old typewriter
i asked you not to save me this time

I need a rest. I need to hold my weaknesses and get to know them. I need to tell you what they are. To learn to speak the things I am not proud of.

I need forgiveness.
I need to ask.

I'm sick of these halfways. Getting away with things without even trying. Using idealism as an excuse for not trying at all, if it cant be perfect. I dont want to be remembered as the friend who always had something funny or clever to say. In the end that is trash. I want quietness to be meaningful. Words consume me too much already. I want to be a person who helps people be the way they should be, or the way they are late at night when no one is looking. I want to be that person. I dont want to be a meaningless parody or a halfhearted paraphrase. Please, please know me. and let me know you.

I want to find ways to show christ through things that look to be plain or useless. painful and true. He is here, too.